Custom Logo Timepiece Sale: Catch it Before it's Gone!
Time seems to move as slow as molasses on the hot, sticky dog days that have blanketed the country for the past few weeks. Yet, when Labor Day rolls around, everyone marvels at how quickly the summer went.
That's why we want to remind you that the 15% off sale on our unique Billable Hour Custom Logo Timepieces runs only through Labor Day. Take advantage of this special offer to order your holiday gifts: when everyone else is scrambling—and maybe even paying rush order fees—later in the year, you can sit back and relax, secure in the knowledge that your holiday shopping is done!
Work/Life Balance? Let's Get Flexible First
by Cheryl Stephens
The future lies in building a firm that recognizes the value of skills and knowledge and treats staff as a valuable asset. Recruitment and retention of valued staff require that the law firm provide and improve work-lifestyle benefits and services, leave benefits, supportive work environments, and alternative work arrangements and schedules. Law firms must now accept alternatives to the 60-hour work week and rigid schedules and place constraints.
Status quo
Linda Duxbury's study, Work-Life Balance in Canada, Making the Case for Change, sets out the facts and makes the full case that, in order to to meet the needs of all Canadians, businesses must alter their expectations, work time and place requirements and benefits. Making the necessary changes will benefit the employee, the family, the employer and the employee's colleagues.
Most North American firms expect a full-time attorney to bill between 1,800 and 2,000 hours to clients in a year—even more in many firms. A part-timer might be expected to bill between 1,100 and 1,200 hours. In Canadian firms (especially smaller firms), the billable hour goals may be lower than the full-time range for U.S. firms.
In response to a 1997 survey of workers conducted by the US Families and Work Institute that asked workers about their ideal amount of time at work, 60 percent of both men and women responded that they would like to work less while only 19 percent of men and women said that they would like to work more. Most workers—both women and men—aspire to work between 30 and 40 hours per week.
Part-time in law firms equals general office full-time
In law firms, the traditional concept of part time as some 20 hours a week doesn't apply. Part time could simply refer to an expectation of 30 to 35 hours a week to make the billable hour quotient of 24 hours a week. For comparison, in 2000 the average American woman worked only 37 hours a week and the average 2-earner family put in a total of 82 hours.
According to an international comparison made by NHK Broadcasting Culture Research Institute, for men in the United States and Denmark, the ratio of time spent at work to time spent at home helping out with house chores and child-rearing is 3 to 1.
Gender-biased schedules
The number of combined work hours for dual-earner families declines as the number of children under the age of 18 increases. However, according to sociologists Kathleen Gerson and Jerry Jacobs, authors of The Time Divide: Work, Family and Gender Inequality, it is mothers, not fathers, who are cutting back. "Fathers actually work more hours when they have children at home, and their work hours increase with the number of children," say the authors.
Gerson and Jacobs argue that accommodating working mothers' needs includes revising regulations on hours of work and providing benefit protections to more workers, moving toward the norm of a shorter work week, creating more family-supportive workplaces that offer both job flexibility and protections for employed parents, and developing a wider array of high quality, affordable child care options.
What is "flexible"?
There is no one-size-fits-all solution to providing alternative work arrangements. An employer is well-advised to have a professional-quality survey of staff conducted to learn what particular changes would benefit its employees and are feasible in the organization. Basically, the employer needs to be open to changes in work schedules and work location.
Alternative work arrangements include:
telework, telecomuting and flexplace: working from home or satellite offices during regular business hours
schedule modifications: day to day, long term, or temporary
flexible start and stop times: core mid-day hours surrounded by flexbands
part time work, voluntary and with full or prorated benefit coverage
job sharing with pro-rated salary and full or prorated benefits
compressed work week such as four 8 1/2-hour days
In addition,
provide a limited number of days paid leave each year for childcare, elder care, or personal problems
provide short-term and long-term personal and parental/family leaves (paid or unpaid) beyond the statutory provisions for sick leave and vacation
Accommodation for flextime lawyers
Firms must create a supportive environment for those who take advantage of alternate work arrangements. Efforts should focus on making the people feel valued by the firm and included in its life and culture. To empower lawyers who work a flexible or reduced schedule the firm can:
facilitate networking within the firm and with clients;
provide support and career guidance; and,
effect change thoughtfully.
Managers, partners and any supervisory staff must have the necessary training to be able to cope with the challenges of managing the new workplace. They must not only tolerate flexibility: they must practice it, or the employees beneath them will not believe that the alternatives are truly available without loss of future advancement.
See more articles about flex time in law firms that appear in the press.
The Business Value of Flexiblity
Duxbury's study chronicled the business costs of an inflexible setting in which employees experienced conflict between work and personal obligations. The UT-Houston Work-Life Taskforce looked at benefits of flexibility in a 2001 study. According to Duxbury, they found both qualitative and quantitative benefits.
The quantitative benefits include:
employee time savings
increased output due to increased focus and motivation
increased employee retention
increased income
decreased expenses
decreased health care costs
lower levels of stress-related illness
reduced absenteeism
The qualitative benefits included:
improved employee morale and loyalty
enhanced employee rectruitment
enhanced public and community relations
happier, better-served clients
The "Or Else"
Counsel On Call, a company founded and headed by attorney Jane H. Allen, places well-credentialed and experienced attorneys in part-time or project positions in law firms and corporate legal departments. The company was ranked number 133 on the 2004 Inc. 500 List of the fastest growing privately held companies in the United States as compiled by Inc. Magazine.
While legal outsourcing and part-time staffing is commonplace for clerical and paralegal positions, Counsel On Call has taken this one step further. Allen explained: "Our primary business is to place high quality lawyers into substantive assignments in firms or corporate legal departments. Our typical contract attorney is someone who would be on the partnership track within the firm but, for whatever reason, has decided to pursue an alternative career path."
Counsel On Call is a pioneer in creating a new career option for those who enjoy the intellectual challenges of practicing law, but want a schedule that enables them to pursue or enjoy things outside the profession. Lawyers no longer accept that the practice of law must be comprised of 80-hour work weeks and a gruelling partnership track.
As with any change process, this transformation of the workplace should be managed with care and attention to the process.
Cheryl Stephens, Mentor/Muse, is a retired lawyer who can't seem to stop teaching, writing, and bouncing around to speaking engagements. She can be reached at email@cherylstephens.com.
Cartoon: Stu's Views
by Stu Rees
Humor: Lawghter is the Best Medicine
by Sean Carter
Even in the best of times, the practice of law can be stressful. The constant pressure to bill hours, meet deadlines, and acquire new business can take its toll. It’s no wonder that, as a profession, we suffer among the highest instances of divorce, substance abuse and being shot in the face by the Vice President. In short, stress (not to mention Cheney’s poor aim) are literally killing us.
So how do we fight stress? By taking to heart the old adage that "laughter is the best medicine." Of course, this adage was penned long before the advent of antibiotics, laser surgery and Viagra, so it may be somewhat outdated. Nevertheless, there is much truth to the proposition that laughter has a beneficial effect on one’s health.
Numerous studies have documented the healthful effects of laughter. Interestingly, one study demonstrated that pre-schoolers laugh an average of 300 times per day, while adults only laugh 15 times per day. It’s probably not a coincidence that pre-schoolers tend not to suffer from high-blood pressure, ulcers, or in the case of my children, any guilt for ransacking our home on a daily basis.
And while most adults are far too serious, lawyers are even more so. For example, a few years ago, the Radio-Television Interview Report dubbed me as "America’s Funniest Lawyer." Needless to say, I was proud to have been given this accolade. That is, until a lawyer friend told me that being named the "funniest lawyer" was akin to being named the "most honest politician," the "most lively mortician," or the "sexiest woman in the WNBA." In other words, it’s not saying a lot.
He was right. Far too many of us have bought into the myth that in order to be a real professional, we must be real serious . . . all the time. With the exception of the things we say to law students during recruiting season, nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, given the often grave matters we confront on behalf of our clients, a sense of humor is every bit as necessary to the practice of law as analytic thinking, strong communications skills, and the ability to stay awake during a CLE course on legal ethics.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting that humor is appropriate in all situations. For example, I wouldn’t suggest you break the news of an indictment by using a knock-knock joke or riddle. "Hey Steven, what’s white and orange all over? You! When they put the orange jumpsuit on you at the jail! Hahaha!" That certainly isn’t the best way to garner referrals from existing clients.
Likewise, a judge probably won’t appreciate it if you start your opening statements by addressing the jury as "Ladies and germs" or ending your remarks with "Take my client. Please!" And given that these particular jokes are as old as Father Time himself (i.e., Dick Clark), you’re probably not going to earn a lot of points with the jury either.
Yet, there are many instances where humor is not only appropriate, but welcomed. In fact, at times, it can be your greatest professional asset. This is particularly true in contentious negotiations. Often times, competitiveness and petty squabbling threaten a potentially profitable deal for all parties. A good-natured quip can be just what the lawyer ordered in these situations.
For instance, I was once in a negotiation which was rapidly overheating, much like my first car; and just as likely to break down altogether. Honest differences of opinions began to turn into personal attacks. Sensing that we were reaching an impasse, I attempted to inject some humor into the situation. Before long, the animosity had dissipated and we were all in agreement that, namely, I shouldn’t quit my day job. Yet, in the end, the deal was salvaged and I like to think that my quick thinking (and ravishing good looks) had something to do with it.
Therefore, the next time you find yourself stressed to the point of going "legal," remember to keep your sense of humor. Find something funny in the situation. If not, you could always turn to prayer: "Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage the change the things that I can change, and the wisdom not to stab opposing counsel in the parking lot." It works for me!
Sean Carter, Humorist at Law, is a syndicated columnist and popular speaker who presents Comedic Legal Education programs for law firms, in-house legal departments and bar associations across the country. Sean is also the author of If It Does Not Fit, Must You Acquit? Your Humorous Guide to the Law.
Audio Interview: Simon Tupman, Author of Why Lawyers Should Eat Bananas
Lawyers in the United States aren't the only ones concerned with the billable hour and its effects on their lives: attorneys the world over seek work/life balance. Recently, Australian speaker, author and coach Simon Tupman talked to The Billable Hour Company about work/life balance and answered the burning question: "Why should lawyers eat bananas?"
Oddservations: What the Coffee Pot Saw
by Bob Pladek
This coffee plunges into the stomach . . . the mind is aroused, and ideas pour forth like the battalions of the Grand Army on the field of battle . . . . Memories charge at full gallop . . . the light cavalry of comparisons deploys itself magnificently; the artillery of logic hurry in with their train of ammunition; flashes of wit pop up like sharp-shooters. ~Honore de Balzac (1799-1850)
Holy scamoley. Apparently I’ve been drinking the wrong kind for years. As have most of the CEOs I’ve worked for.
The issue today, yesterday and no doubt tomorrow is this: who keeps leaving the coffee pot one-quarter-full-three-quarters empty?
In an office of 25 underpaid reporters, administrators and editors—all stuck in the daily grind —it took three years to get the comptroller to buy a commercial coffeemaker. One of those two-pot deals from Bunn—warm pot on top, another brewing below. What we failed to realize was it now gives the staff double the opportunity to be lazy. It seems unlikely anybody is going to spill the beans, and equally unlikely we’ll convince Mr. Tight to install video surveillance equipment and catch the elusive Joe.
Office tension has been percolating as employees, java-script enabled, roast each other with mucho mocha e-mail and e-cards, delivered, steaming, without pretense of etiquette. People eye each other suspiciously as they return to their desk with a freshly filled cup. The kitchenette has become an uncomfortable place, with coffee-good-doers resorting to wholesale dumping of half-pots and re-brewing, lest they be the last one seen exiting the area, a scorched pot later to be found, and the natural conclusion drawn. Meanwhile the real culprits remain at large.
There are dynamics at work here: First, people tend to focus on the small things when they’ve been hammered into believing they have no control over the big ones. In most organizations management does little to discourage this mindset, imagining "power-to-the-people" is properly confined to the political arena. And there, in theory only, thank goodness.
The other psychological struggle tearing up us New Jersey Lawyerians is the totem pole syndrome: coffee-making ranks up (or down) there with "doing the dishes," "cleaning the refrigerator" (material and bacteria enough for a novella, not just column) and general common-area mop-up that marks you as either (1) a low-level grunt or (2) someone who doesn’t have enough real work. Better to avoid either stigma, and continue the façade you have "more important things to do," the reality being you don’t or if you do, you won’t do them anyway.
The non-coffee drinkers find this all pretty amusing, as it reinforces their smug health-food airs and stereotypes of caffeine-addicts as people who—caring little for their own bodies—obviously won’t show concern for anyone else. To them, one thing is very clear: since they don’t drink the stuff, it’s not their problem. Which is kind of like saying if you don’t have children, funding local education isn’t your problem either. But I can’t quite convince my own self of the power of that analogy.
I don’t know what the solution is: sensitivity training is an option, but honestly I don’t want my associates to lose their other edges. It’s what makes them, and me, no doubt, at all tolerable. My concern is less that I have to make two pots for each cup I drink than that some other disgruntled drinker—high on 10 cups or down 10 from where he/she should be—will someday "snap." Postal-kind-of-snap.
Then we’ll not only be underpaid, but understaffed. And our coffee conundrum will become a critical caffeine crud crisis.
Bob Pladek is Special Sections Editor for New Jersey Lawyer. This article is reprinted with their permission, which wasn’t overly begrudgingly given. Bob’s views, thankfully, are entirely his own. You can reach him at Robert.pladek@njlnews.com.
Cartoon: Juris Comic
Video: Crackberry Blackberry
We all know lawyers who are addicted to their Blackberries. Now there's a cure:
Book of the Month Redux: The Billable Hour Re-evaluates Anonymous Lawyer: A Novel
Last month, we compiled a number of reviews of Anonymous Lawyer: A Novel. Based on early reviews from some well-known bloggers, we concluded that the majority of reviewers had given the book a thumbs-down.
After reading our piece, the book's author, Jeremy Blachman, drew our attention to a number of reviews we hadn't mentioned in our piece and asked us to correct the record. We agreed.
We had seen some of the reviews Blachman pointed out to us, but had not put them in the "thumbs up" camp either because (1) we did not consider them to be positive reviews (the Publisher's Weekly review, for example, called the book "side-achingly funny" but also said that it's "[w]ritten in the rapidly dating blog-form and about as subtle as a punch to the kidneys") or (2) the reviews were not by individuals whose work we are familiar with (Howard Bashman's wife and Patterico of the eponymous Patterico's Pontifications, for example). However, we had not come across many of the other positive reviews. Additionally, since we heard from Blachman, other positive reviews have hit the wires. Here, we feature positive reviews from those writers with whom we are most familiar (other reviews are collected on the Anonymous Law Firm website).
Carolyn Elefant over at My Shingle—which, as the name suggests, is a blog devoted to all things solo—was surprised at how much she enjoyed the book. Her review, probably the most literate of the positive reviews out there, compares Anonymous Lawyer to Camus' The Stranger.
Jeremy Blachman's new book, The Anonymous Lawyer, [sic] is friggin' hysterical. If you don't laugh out loud when reading this book then you (1) haven't been in the legal profession long enough to get jaded, or (2) you are only pretending to read the book while thinking about something else (i.e., why you ever agreed to become an associate in a 500 lawyer firm).
Seriously, if you have a sense of humor and an interest in the law, then get this book and read it. But read it somewhere that you don't mind making a complete fool out of yourself as you snort and chuckle. Last warning: you won't be able to put it down so don't bring it with you to work.
In a nutshell: This book is simply great. If you have any interest at all in the law as a profession, this book will be one of the best "light" reads of your summer. As all the reviews point out, it’s so funny you’ll laugh out loud. And of course it is! What else would we expect from the genius behind the blog from which the book developed? On top of that, it’s one of the first books written almost completely in blog posts and its ending is likely to surprise you. But if you pick up this book only expecting some great laughs, be warned: Serious commentary on the state of the legal profession lurks just behind every outrageous thought, statement, and action of the Anonymous Lawyer. That’s what makes this book truly great: like all great satire, even as it’s making you fall out of your chair with laughter, it’s also commenting seriously on the characters and themes it constantly mocks. Ostensibly the book is about the Anonymous Lawyer’s (the AL) struggle to become chairman of his firm. But buried in the jokes is the story of why no one should want to be any part of that firm in the first place, let alone its chairman. It’s funny, but it will probably make you think, too.
I too received an advance copy of Anonymous Lawyer and also found it a great read. As Ernie the Attorney said, it's "friggin' hysterical." One of the reasons I'm looking forward to the book's release is so that I can buy copies for my friends, lawyers and non-lawyers both. In fact, that's one of the nice things about the book--since it's meant to be funny and satirical, not realistic, it requires no previous legal experience to enjoy. Example: my hard-to-please 17-year-old daughter Lydia, who finished Anonymous Lawyer in two days and pronounced it "excellent."
Evan's daughter isn't the only one who found the book to be a quick read: although it came out only a week or so ago, you can already buy used copies on Amazon.com
What do you think? Read Anonymous Lawyer: A Novel and let us know. We'll include reviews by our subscribers in future issues of The Timesheet.
Humor: Much Swearing Necessary at Closings
by James Rose
A title closing used to be a simple thing that required no more than an exchange of a deed for a check. The whole thing took about as long as a haircut, and involved about the same number of people. Now haircuts have become much more complicated, and so have closings.
First came the requirement to fill out a RESPA statement. RESPA is an acronym that stands for Redundant and Excessive Paperwork Act. ERISA is an acronym too, but I don't know what it stands for or means. (I used to think that FICA was an acronym, too. Then I found out that Tony Fica was a
computer clerk for Congress. He wrote the FICA deduction into an obscure federal appropriations bill for the construction of sewage plants, and now he sits on the beach in Pago Pago collecting all of our FICA deductions.) I wish I could enlighten you on where all the complete RESPA forms go, but I
guess we should all rejoice that an army of clerks has not been hired to read them all and send them back for corrections.
Next came the requirement for a certificate of occupancy (referred to as the "Sea of Oh" at closings. Neophyte attorneys who are asked where the Sea of Oh is should not start looking in a World Atlas), the fire underwriter's certificate, and the termite inspection. That is, an inspection for termites, not by them. It assures the buyers that termites have not been on the land openly and notoriously for so long that they can assert a claim to the title by adverse possession.
Then came the requirement for a multitude of ever-increasing affidavits. The FHA and VA have raised to an art form the necessity and array of swearing that must go on at a closing, such as the No Lead Paint affidavit, the House is Not in a Flood Plain Affidavit, and the like.
New York has expanded on the title company's lonely affidavit of no other name, and the occasional affidavit that the deponent is not the person who incurred some substantial judgment of record charging plaid sport coats at Sears. Now we have the no revolving credit affidavit and the gains tax
affidavit-in which the seller swears that he bought the house for $60,000 and sold it for $120,000, and did not make more than $500,000 on the deal.
A recent unwelcome addition has been the Foreign Investors Real Property Tax Affidavit. Soon the buyer will be required to affirm that the money he is investing in he home is not proceeds from spying for a foreign government, or made as a traveling salesman selling of arms to a foreign government out
of the White House Bargain Basement.
Now social policies have crept into the commercial transaction. General Business Law § 378 requires an affidavit that working smoke alarms are present. It is an admirable goal to protect our houses from fire, but we must ask what other social goals will creep into this formerly innocent exchange of deed and keys for a bank check. If we have to do this when we purchase a home, what will we have to do in the future when we purchase a car, or a bagel? An affidavit of no poppy seeds? There is presently more swearing going on than at the scene of a traffic accident involving three truck drivers.
Perhaps we need an affidavit that the home has no bats in the belfry, squirrels in the attic, skeletons in the closet, and that no one besides those listed in the affidavit have keys to the premises. Has the Assemblyman from Amityville introduced a bill which would require proof that the house is free of poltergeists, not built on an Indian burial ground, and that nothing in the house goes bump in the night except the furnace? Wouldn't all prospective purchasers like to have a certification from the sellers that the house is not in a Bad Karma Zone (that there are
no quarrelsome neighbors, no nearby religious cult, radical group or motorcycle gang in the neighborhood)? That the basement is certified as dry, and that a river does not run through it?
Shouldn't the Landmarks Preservation Commission certify that they do not consider the property worthy of designation, so that the buyer knows he can put aluminum siding on it or paint it garish colors? Should the Health Department certify that the house has been occupied by non-smokers? That the garden was grown without pesticides? That the owner's dog has not buried anything noxious on the property?
Westchester County has already required that a seller certify that the home has been tested for excessive radon readings on the premises. High radon readings have been found in northern Westchester County. Coincidently, that is the roughly the same area that deeds in Westchester recite reserves to
the heirs of Philipse mining and mineral rights. Perhaps the state or the county should just insist that the heirs of Philipse remove their dangerous minerals that are emitting radon. A flying squad of radon busters could be enlisted.
So when you next appear at a closing with the affidavit that the home is not in the glide path of an alien spacecraft clutched in your hand, remember all the other affidavits you need. Otherwise the title closer will have to request that you execute an affidavit of no other affidavits.
James M. Rose is an attorney and legal humorist in White Plains, New York. The Supreme Court Jester is a collection of Mr. Rose's articles in book form.
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